Playful Learning

I don't usually double-post things, but for some reason I felt led to go ahead and do this one - when I feel a prompting like that, I just have to trust that the Lord will do with it as He pleases. This is what I posted today on the Women by Grace column I write each week.

Steven and I have a game we love to play. I love to kiss his belly. There’s just something so sweet and precious about that poochy little belly! Getting that “belly kiss” as well call it has turned into this little game…

“May I have a belly kiss?”

“No!” (with a huge grin)

“Please?”

“No!” (a cackle)

“Pleeeeease?”

“A little one.” (pulls up his shirt just a tad and lets me give him a little kiss)

“Now a big one!” (huge grin - pulls his shirt all the way up for a big kiss)

It’s a precious little game that he and I both love. But, the other day I discovered that it might need to be changed just a bit.

You see, Steven was learning a lot from this game. He was learning how to ask me for things he wanted! He began coming up to me and making his request. If I said no, he would say, “Please?” If I said no again, he would give me a big, huge, pleading (and precious), “Pleeeease?” When I still said no, he would get quite upset.

At first it just irritated me that he wouldn’t accept my answer. But, then it occurred to me that he was following my example! He was just doing what I’d taught him to do in our play time!

Ouch!

Our kids learn from every thing we do. They learn from our actions, our words, our play, our work, our procrastination, our attention, our distraction - every little or big thing. How often do we slip in our attentiveness to what we say and do? How often do we teach our little ones without even thinking about it!

We’ve changed our game. I still ask for that sweet belly kiss, and if he says yes immediately, I gladly accept the kiss. If he says no, I say, “Yes, sir, I accept your answer.” The first time I responded that way, he just looked at me as if I’d ruined his day! He quickly offered me a big huge belly kiss! Since then, though, he’s caught on, and the fun of our little game has returned. Only now it’s a little game that is teaching him how he needs to respond when I answer “no” to his requests. And guess what? He’s slowly beginning to change his behavior!

Even as we play…