A Smile

I never quite know what to write on days like this. Yes, I remember. And yes, I still cry at the memory. But I also smile sometimes. How can I smile over something as horrible as that day twelve years ago?

Twelve years ago, my oldest was an innocent three and a half month old. Words cannot express how phenomenally happy she was as a baby. She only fussed when she was tired or hungry. And she laughed a lot.

While I stared dumbfounded at the horror on my television screen, my sweet baby laughed and cooed, oblivious to the horror going on in the world around her.

When I look at the precious young lady that innocent baby has become, I smile.

I smile because I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to watch her grow and change.

I smile because I have had the chance to watch her learn to think and process, challenging the foolish ideas of the ungodly world in which she lives.

I smile because I saw her become a child of the King and my sister, and I have been able to be a part of her spiritual growth.

But I smile most of all because I know she has perfect assurance. If a disaster of horrific proportions, whether man-made or natural, were to afflict our family today, she would struggle. She would hurt. She would fight anger and bitterness. But she would know beyond a doubt that she is secure in eternity.

I also smile because her younger siblings have followed her into that assurance. All three children are still young in their faith, but they are growing. They are hungering. And they hunger for others to know their Savior as well. It shows in their prayer requests, in our discussions, and in their concern for other people.

That is why, even when remembering such horrors as we saw twelve years ago, I can smile. I don’t know if I could say the same had I actually been involved. I might feel differently had I lost a loved one or sustained an injury myself. But I didn’t. So, I get to stand today in prayer for those who did. I get the opportunity to pray that they will come into the same assurance my children possess. And I get to pray that God will bless them with a smile.